During the past month, I have been bombarded with clients who want to hold onto unhealthy relationships. In many cases, the other person does not consider them a priority and even goes as far as ignoring them for lengthy periods of time. "Do you hate yourself?", I ask. Only a person that dislikes themselves would be tolerant of such behavior; but as I meditate the answer is usually that the client hates confronting rejection. It is the rejection that makes them feel unworthy, not the person. So the client strives to regain a negative part of their life because they did not have authority to end the relationship. Ultimately it is simply a way to gain control. "Oh if I could just get her back, then I would dump her. Will he try to get back with me, so that I can refuse him?" Not only are these immature ways of thinking, but it is also an invitation for misery.
If you are hanging on to a person that doesn't seem to be hanging on to you, contemplate the history that the two of you have shared. Did the relationship end with him/her going back to a
former lover? Have you been told to move on with your life? Has the other person talked to you in a disrespectful manner on several occasions? There are many things that you can ask yourself, but at the end of the day you must let go of the other person if they do not make a positive contribution to your life.
Upgrade your lovelife
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